Sunday, December 13, 2015

Another Trying Week - Mama Not Doing Well

Hi All,

The title pretty much says it all.  That said, everyone that I needed to notify - family and friends of family - has been contacted by now.  So I feel free to post this here now.  What follows is excerpts from an email that DKW wrote to notify some friends:   (Please note I left out a lot of medical and personal details for privacy's sake.)

Hi, Folks:  Some of you are aware that Carolyn's mental and physical health has declined rapidly in the past six to seven weeks.  Dementia has not just made an appearance, but has moved in, settled down, and taken up permanent residency.  She is cognizant at times, but it is rather sporadic and sometimes it's difficult to tell if she is recognizing the world, people, and words around her.

 We are asking that no one feel any sort of pressure to visit, however if you want to do so, you certainly may.  We will be taking things one day at a time, of course, and ask that you call before you plan to come, so that we can let you know if that is a good time.  Carolyn has been sleeping lots and lots, but there are times when we are bathing and caring for her more intimate needs that would be most inconvenient to receive visitors at those times or shortly thereafter, as these activities are extremely exhausting for Carolyn.

For those of you who live out of the area and yet would like to be of assistance, please do not feel you must hasten or plan to be here for services and such.  Jerry is available in the evenings for phone calls, from 4:30p to 6:30p {except tonight, Thursday Dec 10th ~~ he is actually being Santa for the children at Emerson today, as he has for the past seven years}.  Carolyn is not really present in any sort of way, and I feel any visits at this point would not be noted by her.  So please do not feel you must come to see her.  It'd be much better if you remember her as the caring and loving person she was when you knew her. 

As far as us:  Jerry is, of course, grieving.  It hurts to see his mother so incapacitated.  However, he is strong and since her decline has been rapid, her suffering has been minimal, of that he is extremely glad.  Please understand, if he seems distracted or abrupt on the phone.

As for myself, I really am ok.  I appreciate your concern and condolences; however, at this time, I'd rather focus on Carolyn and process things more deeply at some later time.  Thank you all for your consideration and understanding, D.

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